What To Do With the Body

  News story…. 

  It seems a family had donated a loved one’s body “to science” upon the loved one’s death.  I didn’t get all the details but there was a big dust-up because the family found out that the medical facility that received the body sold off some of the dead person’s body parts.

  It’s a perfectly legal thing to do here in New Mexico.  For instance as part of the report a TV station covering the story ordered a real human foot for just over $300. 

  Lots of folks get weird when you talk about death and “final arrangements” and stuff.

  It’s hard for some people to grasp that it’s part of the deal of coming here to Planet Earth…you’re born, you die.

  Death opens up a huge discussion amongst folks.  The bottom line is, though, the spiritual deal is an individual thing…you know, where you go, who you see, what happens next.  The fact is, once a person is called off the Great Stage of Life the survivors must decide what to do with the leftover biomechanical suit.

  Funerals…people coming and going to view the body, services and such…are one thing, what to actually factually do with the remains are another.

  But now there are more options than there used to be.

  For instance, imagine my amazement when a few years ago I found out that a person can be made into a diamond after they die.

  This opens up a whole world of new possibilities and weirdness.

   I found this out after reading people are requesting when they die and are cremated, their ashes be mixed in with concrete to be made part of artificial reefs off the Pacific coast.  In the course of the article it mentioned the diamond thing.

  It turns out that once you’re cremated your ashes may be sent off to this company that will put those ashes through a process that will result in a diamond.  We are, after all, a carbon-based being so our ashes (I’m guessing here) are carbon ash.  Diamonds are nothing more than highly compressed carbon. 

  It was only after watching an old episode of “CSI Miami” I learned the process for making diamonds exists.

  Once the cremated remains are put through the process the result is a rough diamond.  The jewelers at the “we-make-a-diamond-out-of-your-ashes” company then send your loved ones a very nice cut diamond.  The price is roughly $13,000 per carat.  The smallest job they’ll do costs around $2,000.

  I’m finding out more and more folks are opting for cremation.  Ashes can be made into glass ornaments, jewelry, stuff like that.

  Of course there’s always the same old thing of simply disposing of the ashes.

 My mom always talked about cremation for herself.  When I was a kid she wanted her ashes left on a high point along the Appalachian Trail.  Then she wanted them taken out into the Atlantic Ocean.  She didn’t want a funeral, she wanted to simply be remembered. 

  The original plan was that sometime after she passed he, my sister and I would ride out in his boat into the Atlantic.  Each of us will say a few words then put my mom’s ashes out to sea.

  In the end half of her ashes were put by my dad’s grave in Virginia, the other half went to Waikiki Beach in Hawai’I, a place she dearly loved and where we lived once upon a time.

  Me?  The Lady of the House says she’d like to make a funeral pyre for me in the back yard, shovel up the ashes and mix it in with the dirt in her tomato patch.

  What we do with people is one thing, pets are another.  Many years ago I discovered people freeze dried their dead pets.  I suppose having beloved cats and dogs stuffed has been going on for years.  Those who have it done say freeze drying gives the late animal a more “life-like” appearance.

  I had read where people are taking the ashes of cremated pets and mixing the stuff with resin.  The resulting paste (I guess that’s what it’s called) is then formed into shapes and squiggles around a photo of the pet in a frame.

  I once proposed the same thing be done with people, except using the resin pressed into a form to make an actual picture frame that would hold a photo of the deceased.

  My idea was greeted with derision by my pals.

  “What if you could see the actual bone fragments?”

  “Well if that bothers someone I suppose before you made the resin you could grind it up into a finer powder,” I replied.

  People still did not think this was a good idea.

  It’s kinda sorta like my idea of making a used hearse into a camper.

  “Dead people have been back there.”

  “But they’re not there now,” I would say.  “Look, those things are nice and roomy.  Besides, the great musician Neil Young used to drive one around Hollywood in the 1960’s.”

  Folks would then remind me I was on The High Plains and it was no longer the 1960’s.

  I think turning me into a diamond after I die sounds like a neat idea.

  “I could wear you around my neck,” said The Lady of the House.  “You could be watching over me while I date new guys.”

  Maybe I should think about it some more.

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